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Just a few of the highly caffeinated thoughts darting around my head at Starbucks this morning…

What happened to the cream/sugar/straw area? Where is it?! I think I’m having a panic attack. Ah! There it is — 10 feet over from it’s original spot. Phew! They shouldn’t DO that kind of thing to people.

Is that barista pregnant? She’s always been heavy, but now she’s HUGE. It IS concentrated at approximately uterus height. God, she can hardly get around the other people working this morning. Okay! She just said, “pregnant woman coming through!”. Now I can ask her when she’s due. No. We’re not there yet in our relationship. I won’t go there.

Is that guy actually playing a keyboard…a piano keyboard? He is! When you think about it, is it really that different from a laptop? Yes. Yes it is. It’s hanging over the edge of his little table — it’s huge. He must think he’s Harold Faltemeyer. Maybe he IS Harold Faltermeyer. Nah. Probably not. Times have been lean since Beverly Hills Cop, but I doubt he’s living in Lancaster. Hey! Remember they used his song in Monsters vs. Aliens? They totally did. I hope he treated himself to a nice vacation with the royalties.

Two pumps of Hazelnut IS the perfect amount. I wasn’t sure before, but one is definitely not enough and three is too much. Glad that’s settled.

9:00 already!? I don’t want to go to work. I mean, I REALLY don’t want to go to work. I could sit here all day. If I wasn’t working, I’d have the dog with me, though. We could sit outside! We LOVE sitting outside at Starbucks! They give Bailey ice water. Work sucks.

I totally want to be one of those people that walks into Starbucks and a barista says, “Hey! Cafe Latte, whole milk, two pumps Hazelnut! What’s up?!” Is that sad? Probably. But not as sad as wishing that I had a regular bar — like on Cheers. That’s what I wanted after college – that place “where everybody knows your name”. [hums like a crazy person]