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On the way to the bowling alley yesterday…

Will: What size shoe do you wear, Mom?

Me: Ladies 7.5.

Will: The pair I have on say they are a ladies size 3. Do you think we’ll have bigger feet than you when we grow up?

Me: Probably. Boy’s feet are usually bigger.

Evan: What size does Dad wear?

Me: A size 8. So did MY dad, by the way.

Evan: Did our dad know your dad?

Me: Sure, but only for about two years before he died.

Evan: So we missed that funeral. I guess that leaves about (lists our extended family members) ten? I might not go to (insert distant aunt)’s though. I don’t really even know her that well. I would definitely go to Will’s. Would you go to mine, Will?

Will: Thanks. Sure.

Evan: (murmur, murmur, murmur)

Will: How are you going to do THAT?

Evan: Easy. In the hospital, BEFORE you die, tell your wife to make sure that your brother gets the biggest plate of food at the buffet.

Will: Why are we even talking about this? What is WRONG with you?!

Evan: Well, it’s sad when somebody dies, but if there isn’t enough food afterwards, that’s REALLY sad.