On the way to the bowling alley yesterday…
Will: What size shoe do you wear, Mom?
Me: Ladies 7.5.
Will: The pair I have on say they are a ladies size 3. Do you think we’ll have bigger feet than you when we grow up?
Me: Probably. Boy’s feet are usually bigger.
Evan: What size does Dad wear?
Me: A size 8. So did MY dad, by the way.
Evan: Did our dad know your dad?
Me: Sure, but only for about two years before he died.
Evan: So we missed that funeral. I guess that leaves about (lists our extended family members) ten? I might not go to (insert distant aunt)’s though. I don’t really even know her that well. I would definitely go to Will’s. Would you go to mine, Will?
Will: Thanks. Sure.
Evan: (murmur, murmur, murmur)
Will: How are you going to do THAT?
Evan: Easy. In the hospital, BEFORE you die, tell your wife to make sure that your brother gets the biggest plate of food at the buffet.
Will: Why are we even talking about this? What is WRONG with you?!